How To Bear The Weight
Summary of Chapter 11
It is hard to exercise dominion. Men have always struggled with it. The curse on Adam runs deep in his sons. Today, the weight feels heavier, crushing even. Men buckle under despair, frustration, and rage when they realize the fight before them.
In The Matrix, the choice is simple: the red pill or the blue pill. Take the red pill, and you see the world as it is—brutal, dystopian. Take the blue pill, and you stay in the comfort of a lie. This is more than a movie plot. It mirrors a harsh reality. Men wake up to discover society ravaged by feminism, fatherlessness, and betrayal from the church. Whether you come from an absent father, a coddling mother, or a culture that hates men, the question isn't if you've failed to launch—it's how much. Some doors are closed forever. Some dreams were lies from the start. Rage follows. Red pill rage.
Many men stay there, stewing in bitterness. They are victims of a war against manhood. But this isn’t new. Judges 2 tells us there’s nothing new under the sun. You can either carry the failures of your fathers into the future or break the cycle. You can choose to be a victim, or you can take responsibility.
Ephesians says, "Be angry and do not sin." It’s okay to feel it. But rage without action is effeminate. A godly man acts in faith. He lives as if Christ is King, ordering the world to His will. The anger of man won’t produce God’s righteousness. It never has. It never will.
Men stuck in rage become worthless. This is where movements like MGTOW come from—men glorifying passivity. Brotherhood can be powerful, but be careful. Fraternities built on shared rage feed bitterness, not growth. You need brothers who’ve made progress, who’ve fought the same battles and won. Hebrews says, "Lift your drooping hands and strengthen your weak knees." Seek men who live that.
Patriarchy starts with submission—to God, not your feelings. Your mission comes under God’s mission. He ordered your life. Even if it feels unfair, it's yours. The state of your life may not be your fault, but it’s your responsibility. That’s dominion.
Dominion isn’t glamorous. It’s toil. It’s grind. Proverbs talks about the sluggard’s field, overgrown with thorns because he didn’t do the work. Sluggards crave but get nothing. They dream but never act. Don’t be that man.
The curse in Genesis explains why this is hard. The ground fights back. Men work by the sweat of their brow, only to return to dust. But avoiding work doesn’t lift the burden; it adds another—guilt, shame, and failure. Work is part of who we are. It’s where we find fulfillment. Even secular studies show retired men often sink into depression. We are workers. God made us that way.
So how do you find joy in toil? The answer is Christ. He redeems our work. Because of Him, we’re not slaves but sons. Our labor isn’t to earn favor—we already have it. God prepared good works for us to walk in. That’s purpose.
Colossians says, "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord." Even mundane tasks have value when done in faith. We don’t need the approval of others. God’s promises are enough.
Jesus lifts the curse’s weight. His yoke is easy, His burden light. Focus on God’s mission, and you’ll find your own. Mission first, brothers. That’s how you live a life of dominion.
Questions for Reflection
Where in your life have you been tempted to remain in bitterness or rage rather than taking responsibility, and how might faith in Christ reframe those struggles?
What areas of your life feel overgrown with “thorns,” like the sluggard’s field in Proverbs, and what small, faithful steps can you take to cultivate them with purpose and diligence?
How do you define dominion in your daily life, and in what ways can you align your work, relationships, and responsibilities more closely with God’s mission rather than your own feelings or frustrations?